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Saturday, January 21, 2017

Women's March 2017 - Dear Grandaughters,


My dear granddaughters,

Consider your world thoughtfully.

I am so grateful the campaign politics of 2016 has come to an end. I knew it would, one way or the other. I knew there would be those who mourned Jan. 20, 2017 and others who cheered, celebrated and looked forward to "change". It's like that every four years. There is always a winner of an election and there is always a loser of an election. You will experience being on both sides. Don't be a snotty winner and don't be a boobing loser. Stand up, overcome and put your shoulder to the wheel. Life goes on and there is dirty clothes to wash and toilets to scrub.

This post is not about who won or who lost, but about you my little girl. My sweet grand-recruit 3. The events of yesterday and those of tomorrow will shape the world you will find yourself in when you are my age. You have some influence. Be wise about where you exert that influence. Otherwise you will feel unsettled, hopeless and exhausted. Act where you can and don't take on what you have no control over.

Always walk with purpose and determination
I find myself more reflective and less vocal as I get older. I think I saw a meme somewhere that said that is what wisdom does to you. I don't know if that's true, I think I'm just tired and really don't care to engage in the heated debates that often have resulted in hurt feelings, name calling and demeaning of someone who you call 'friend'. That result cancels out any real sharing of thought, opinion or ideology. Keep that in mind. Berating and belittling some one's view point will never end well or be productive. Just watch footage from this past year. Even if you "win" your argument, you will lose something much greater.

I have my opinion, believe me. It's just as strong and defined as the next grandmother, but I find I don't need to always engage and defend it. It's still mine. I've done a lot more listening this go round.

little girl with hand on hip
Be firm and strong when you find what you believe.
I am not marching in person. I have a hard time with large crowds, the energy, the possibilities of what could happen are just not something I want to deal with... New Year's Eve in downtown San Antonio many years ago ruined me and my ability to handle enormous crowds where I might be trampled to death, or stabbed, or crushed or kidnapped or... you get the picture.

 My behind was pinched repeatedly that New Year's Eve on the way to the car and when Granddaddy Oohrah encircled me in his arms and pushed us through the crowd a knife fight broke out right in the direction he was pushing me. YES, I probably need therapy, but avoidance has worked well since 1997. I however am in my heart marching and cheering those on who are moved to march to show solidarity and support for women's rights. I am after all a woman, I gave birth to women and they in turn are giving me the most precious people, my tiny grand-women.

 Does that mean I'm a bra burner? Does that mean I want to hold the Priesthood? Um, no. An emphatic no. I have no idea what each woman today marches for. What their  personal issue might be that draws them into crowds of thousands.

Dance whenever you want!
And I am so okay with each person having their own personal motivation, even if it's not high on my list or if I have a different opinion or view of what women's rights looks like. I don't know that I do, I'm just sticking that caveat in there. I want you and your sister to allow others the room to have their own thoughts and opinions, even if you don't agree with them. THAT IS OKAY. You can love them for who they are without agreeing with them. Your not the boss of them. If you do engage in conversation, state your beliefs and stand by them, but be kind. You will never regret being kind. I promise you.

If I were to march it would be so my posterity would honor, love and cherish the women in their lives. It would be so you would cherish each other and the gifts you each bring to our family, especially because you are women. Unique beautiful daughters of God who have a purpose and who are strong, smart and kind.

9 day old grand-recruit 4, my sweet granddaughter
GR3 loves GR4 and is the sweetest when talking to her sister.

I would march for each woman's agency to determine what she needs to march for, even if it is against what I believe I should march for. I wouldn't march out of fear for the future because of Donald Trump or any other man.  He is but a player on a much bigger, more eternal stage. He will go away just like all presidents go away. He is just a man. One I will pray for, one I hope can do what is right and good and one who I hope gets his Twitter account taken away... 

I prayed for President Obama, and I prayed for President Clinton. Wanting good things for our country is not just for one political party or the other. What each administration leaves as their legacy will just stack neatly on top of every other administrations legacy like a wonky mismatched stack of Lego's. So I think a women's march  should take place after every inauguration. Not just this year. 

Let's march EVERY four years to remind whomever is in office that we are not a silent uneducated population. We are here and not going away. We have voices and will express them... And we vote. We are intricately woven into the history of this nation and we are integral to the strength of our country. 

American women will not go quietly into the night. We won't be shoved back into obscurity. I can't even imagine that being a possibility, but who knows. It doesn't hurt to remind the pant suits that we can wear them too.

Grandmother and GR3 
Many I am saddened march out of fear. Not for the crowds like me, but for the future. I think faith should replace fear. Faith in a higher power, whatever your higher power is. Mine is Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and in their plan. I would march in faith, which ironically because of my very mortal fear, I won't go march. I'm a mess. I know. Hopefully I don't ruin you...

I want each of you to be allowed to live by the dictates of your own conscious. I want you to have equal pay for equal work, I want you to honor those who have gone before that fought for our civil rights so you and I could vote, and we could decide all by ourselves what we think and who we support and if we want to share that or not. I support the march because I believe freedom to choose is one of the biggest blessings in our lives.
Find your own style!

So you can be a mom, or you can be an astronaut or you can be both. Or a ninja. A ninja who wears pearls.


What follows on these posts is true to the best of my knowledge, except what isn't. I only change names to protect the innocent and not so innocent.